


The Right Thing

by comicsandshadowhunters



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: F/F, Multi, Reader-Insert, avengers x reader - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-15
Updated: 2017-02-19
Packaged: 2018-05-14 02:18:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 13,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5726023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/comicsandshadowhunters/pseuds/comicsandshadowhunters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Avengers raid another Hydra base only to find a new enhanced human hidden from the world.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cornered

**Author's Note:**

> This is a reader insert, I haven't decided on a relationship yet or even if there will be one, but it's ultimately an Avengers x Reader.  
> Post Age of Ultron, although I have chosen to ignore a few major plot elements from it (aka the stupid ones).  
> Enjoy!

You looked up as you heard a faint sound from above you. Alarm ran through your body. You were too far underground to hear anything normal from the surface. You looked to the small screen in the corner of your room, nothing alarming had appeared on the screen, so whatever was going on above ground must be routine.

Another half hour passed before anything abnormal happened. But when abnormal things happened to you, man did they happen. The second (what had to be an) explosion rocked even your cell, at least six stories below ground. That's when you got up.

The only access to the outside world you had had for the past 10 years came from the very selective news stories provided by your... superiors, for lack of a better word. You knew about random bits of recent pop culture, and of course the Avengers and Shield. You knew they "protected " the world however they saw fit and ruled with unlimited power. It was a terrifying notion, and completely American.

You weren't sure where exactly you were from. It could be America, could be North Korea for all you knew. But you knew you came from somewhere besides here, you had to have. You have these memories, well more of dreams but they felt so _real_. A woman's voice, a man's laughter, a child's cries, it was the only connection you had to whatever was on the surface.

You were jolted out of your thoughts by a series of grunts coming from outside and entirely too close to your door. Fear shook you to the core. Was this your chance to escape? Were these people fighting to release you, or recapture you and put you through worse torture? Did you even want to leave? All these thoughts raced through your head as you stood frozen hearing the fight move closer to your cell.

A few seconds later and you had made your decision, you were gonna get the hell out of here, whatever it took. You knew they had been messing with your mind, you could never remember anything more than a month into your past, and all you knew was that you were being trained, conditioned for something big. Something that would start a new era. You wanted no part in that.

You glanced through the small glass pane in the door, seeing a tall man and a red haired woman making their way down the hallway, checking every room. Knowing you were only a few doors from being next, you backed yourself into the corner of your cell, not hidden, but out of the way enough that you would see them before they you.

You heard the sound of the keypad outside your door being hacked and took a deep breath, closing your eyes briefly as you heard the lock click and the airlock on your cell deactivate.

Opening your eyes you immediately recognized the overly bright colors of Captain America and knew the woman must be an Avenger also. You knew what these people could do, freezing momentarily before realizing they had no idea what you could do. You scratched at the small piece of metal in your wrist, realizing you had the upper hand. You might not be allowed to use your full strength, but you just might be able to make a run for it.

Just as the red-haired woman turned towards you, you closed your eyes letting your mind reach out into the space in front of you, lifting your hands you opened your eyes just as the woman whispered something about having an enhanced field? You prepared for the worst as she attempted to step towards you. Twisting your hands quickly you forced her clenched fist into her partner's face.

Part of you wanted to stay there, to see how much damage you could make her do before she couldn't take it anymore. You shook your head, _Not_ now, _Y/N._ Releasing any hold you had on the woman you ran.

Running towards a large staircase at the end of the hall, you sprinted up only to be met with an arrow pointed directly at your face, just as the archer was about to say something you attempted to duck around him and run, only to have something slam into the back of your head and electrocute you. The last thing you heard before blacking out was a man's voice saying, "I tried to warn her."


	2. The Tower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Waking up in the Avengers Tower is a bit more eventful than you would have hoped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woohoo I'm debating making this a Steve x reader or Natasha x reader (the story would split in two). Not sure yet, but I'll keep you updated!

As you began to gain consciousness, all you could hear was murmuring and a steady high-pitched beeping. Knowing better than to reveal that your were awake, you started to take inventory, as you called it. First, going through any aches and pains and deducing which ones would pain you the most in case of running or a fight. You found nothing terribly wrong, just a mild headache. Reminding yourself not to sit up too fast just in case of a concussion, you moved on. Second thing to check was for the metal in your wrist, and of course it was still there, waiting for you to put a toe out of line. Third, you checked for people in the room. Pushing your mind to feel around the room you felt nothing, but as you began to extend your reach there were far too many people outside of your room for you to fight off.

Steadying your readily increasing heart rate, you kept up appearances as you heard the door open.

"See, Nat! She's still out, I didn't mean to electrocute her on her head, I was aiming for her back, but she was too quick," said a man you assumed to be the archer from earlier.

Thinking of earlier, you began to wonder, how long had you been out? You took in what your body was telling you, you weren't too famished, so you couldn't have been out for more than a day.

A surprisingly familiar voice pulled you out of your thoughts.

"She's not too bad looking you know, and with whatever the hell kind of powers she has, me and her could have a lot of fun," said another man all to cockily, "Ouch, Romanoff! What was that for?"

You had to stifle a laugh, as you realized someone had hit him. A shuffling of feet alerted you to the fact that someone was moving entirely too close to you.

"Tony, if she wakes up right now, you're a dead man," said a woman, presumably the one who hit him.

"Well, then let's hope she doesn't, eh?" the man Tony said.

You felt his hand move to touch your wrist, but before he got too close to your left side, you opened your eyes bringing your right arm around to pull him into a choke hold.

"Make a move, I snap his neck," you attempted to say menacingly, but your dry throat made it come out more tobacco addict than assassin.

You looked around the room to see the same red-head and archer from before standing in front of you, their arms in the air. Behind them through the glass door of your room---no cell---you saw a man with an eyepatch walking slowly through about four shocked faces, looking to the doorknob, asking your permission to enter.

Hesitantly, you nodded, allowing him entrance, your grip on Tony tightening.

"Nice to see you awake Miss Y/N, Agent Barton here thought he'd knocked you out for good," said the man nodding towards the archer. "Now I'll explain everything if you could just let go of Mr. Stark there, he can be a bit of an ass, I know, but at the moment I would prefer him alive."

You stared at the man trying to connect the dots as fast as you could. Tony Stark, the Iron Man and billionaire, was at your mercy. A red-haired woman and an Agent Barton, Hawkeye you remembered, stood to the sides of the eye-patched man. Judging by their stances, the man in the middle was in charge here, but come down to it he could be taken out easily. Looking outside your cell again you saw four people, a small but strong blonde woman, Captain America, a man in a purple button up shirt and glasses, and farthest away from you was Thor, apparently a God? You'd seen him on the small TV screen back in your old cell.

Looking around you realized there was absolutely no way you could escape without your full powers. You kept your eyes on the man in charge as you slowly released the man in your grasp, realizing you didn't have a choice in the matter. Your eyes didn't move from the man even as Stark made a show of coughing and spluttering around.

"Damn, that girl has got quite a grip," he gasped through his coughing.

No one moved but Stark as the man began to talk again.

"Thank you. My name is Director Fury, and these people around me," he nodded looking around the room, "are the Avengers, and Shield Agents, and we mean you no harm."

You nearly scoffed at the phrase, but settled for raising an eyebrow instead. Seeing you make no move to respond, the Director continued, "As I said I'm Director Fury, this is Agent Natasha Roman---"

You decided to put your full knowledge to use, having connected all the dots, "Natasha Romanoff, Black Widow; Tony Stark, Iron Man; Clint Barton, Hawkeye; Steven Rogers, Captain America; Thor of Asgard; Bruce Banner, The Hulk; and I believe that's Sharon Carter, Agent 13, but I could be off about that one, never actually seen her in action," you finished for him as the others looked at you with alarm. They shouldn't be that surprised though, most of the information you just spat out is public, but they still looked at you in fear, that was something you had gotten used to over the years, though.

Fury did nothing but raise his eyebrows at your sudden decision to speak, "What did Hydra tell you about us, Miss Y/N?"

"Hydra? What the hell is Hydra?" you questioned, sitting up straighter.

"Hydra? The Nazi organization that has been keeping your lovely face locked up for who knows how long? The one we rescued you from? Any of this ringing a bell?" Stark asked almost shocked, it was an interesting expression on him. From the few interviews you'd seen of him, he liked to act like he knew everything.

You shot him a glare before turning back to Fury, "Rescued me? You took me from one cell to another, everything here is the exact same as there, except there I only had wires sticking out of me once a week, not consistently," you hissed at them, " And you're the Avengers, you don't rescue anyone, you wreak havoc and destroy people's homes and lives to get what you want. You haven't done anything for me except electrocute me."

Fury seemed at a loss for words, as the Black Widow moved forward to speak. You subconsciously moved backwards, causing her to still.

"It's obvious you don't trust us," the red-head began, "and you have every right not too. But we are here to help. All of us are just people trying to help this messed up world. Hydra is the name of the organization that has been keeping you all these years. They have kidnapped and captured many others like you for experiments or just simply to do their bidding. We are all here now because our ultimate goal is to rid the world of Hydra, but it's proving to be more difficult than we previously believed. We got word of the base you were kept in not 48 hours ago, and went for a raid. We were told it was just a weapons base, but then we found you and countless scientists specializing in genetics in the lower levels. All of them… died before we could get to them, so we have no information on what their plans were, what they wanted with you, or who you are, besides your first name.

"All we want from you is any information you can give us. You appear to have information on the outside world but it is biased, so I assume you weren't let out very often, but given the way you handled Stark, you have some combat training. They were keeping you for something, we want to know what. You don’t have to talk until your ready, but we don't have forever. Some of our best scientists also want to run some tests to see what exactly your powers are, since you seem to lack total control over them."

Fury seemed to have found his voice as he finished up for her, "Ultimately it's your decision, but like Agent Romanoff said, we don't have forever."

You took a breath before you confessed, "My name is Y/F/N, but they called me Abaddon, I don't know how old I am, I don't know where I was born or who my parents were. All I know is I was kidnapped and taken at a young age. The people that took me knew about my 'power' as you call it, so they tested me. Tortured me to see what would make me snap. They raised me, and enhanced my powers, training me for something big. I remember training for years, but for some reason I can never remember details more than a month into my past. I get pieces of my memories every now and then but they always seem to disappear. People messed with my head and my life and I don't care if they go by Hydra or Shield, I want my revenge."

The director nodded to you, signaling for the others to exit, "Some clothing has been laid out for you, if you will kindly get dressed and then press the call button, someone will come to escort you to the lab, where we can run some tests and talk."

As you moved to stand up you heard shuffling at the doorway and looked up to see Agent Barton standing by the door still.

"Did you need something," you asked, a little more harshly than you intended.

"No, uh, just sorry about the electrocution, I was just trying to keep everyone safe," added the archer on his way out.

You froze, "What did you just say?"

"Um, I said I was sorry? Look I didn't mean to offend or any---"

"No, no I'm… sorry, it's just I've never actually heard that word used before," you admitted, looking down at your now clasped hands.

"Oh, well, see you soon I guess."

"Yeah, thank you."

"Welcome to the Tower, by the way," he smiled closing the door as you stood to pick up the clothing that had been left by the bathroom, moving to change.


	3. Questions and Tests

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More of your past comes out during a long and stressful time in the labs of Avengers Tower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just started a new job so I won't be able to update super regularly, but I should have AT LEAST a new chapter every week from now on :)

Coming out of the small bathroom, you had on a plain white v-neck t shirt and blue jeans that fit perfectly. How they managed that you honestly did not want to know. Exiting your room, you heard a voice.

 

"Miss (Y/N), it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance. My name is FRIDAY, and if you will just follow my instructions, I will lead you directly to Mr. Stark and the others."

 

You jumped looking around to find the source of the female voice. "Where are you?" you questioned, continuing your search.

 

"I am an artificial intelligence program developed by Mr. Stark, I do not have a physical being, but my programing is within a computer in Mr. Stark's office. Now if you will make your way to the elevator on your left, I will have you in the labs in no time," stated FRIDAY rather friendlily, if robots can be friendly that is.

 

You nodded mumbling and okay as you made your way to the elevator. The second you entered the button for floor number 2L lit up and you became to move down.

 

You tried to remember being on an elevator before now, but it was difficult. The concept was in your head already, so you assumed you had been.

 

Yelling and a ding from the elevator broke you from your thoughts. As the doors opened FRIDAY directed you to the third lab on your right, not that you really needed help finding the room, Tony Stark's raised voice was a pretty solid indicator of where you were supposed to go.

 

You scratched at the metal on your wrist as the door in front of you slid open to reveal an annoyed Tony Stark, an exasperated Dr. Banner, and a disinterested Fury talking to Steve and Natasha.

 

"But Bruce---" Tony started.

 

"No, absolutely not, we are not going to run a potentially dangerous test on someone who already doesn't trust us as it is," sighed Dr. Banner.

 

"What do you mean, potentially dangerous?" you questioned, letting everyone know you were there.

 

Stark and Banner looked up surprised, while the others continued their talk, which was apparently more important than your safety.

 

Shaking himself from his shock Dr. Banner approached you. "(Y/N), is it? I'm Dr. Banner, but you can call me Bruce," he said removing his glasses and putting his hand out towards you.

 

You tilted your head unaware of what to do. After a moment he dropped his hand murmuring a never mind before continuing, "I'm gonna being running some tests on you, along with Tony here, if that's all right with you. We would just like to determine the nature and extent of whatever powers you have. While we run the tests, Fury will be asking some questions, and don't worry, nothing too personal, everyone here has pasts that we don't like to dig up."

 

"Okay, but I have some questions too," you said, directing your gaze at Fury.

 

"I'm sure he'll be more than happy to answer some of them," Dr. Banner smiled, leading you over to a metal table and asking you to sit.

 

As soon as you sat down, the conversation between Fury, Natasha, and Steve came to a stop. Fury walked over to you while the others remained seated a few feet away from you.

 

The Director pulled out a chair across from you, turning it so he could straddle it while questioning you. But before he could say anything Dr. Banner began to question you.

 

"So, (y/n), before Director Fury begins his questions, could you give me a brief background on your powers? Just when they started, what you believe they are, and what you can do," he smiled, disarming you a bit, hoping that you will open up to him, at least a bit.

 

You cleared your throat playing with your (y/h/c) hair, "Well I've had some sort of power since I was born, it was just like it was hidden behind a wall or something, so I never really knew I had it until I was about five. I was out somewhere with… someone, and a man came up to me and tried to take me away. Before he could grab me though, I pictured him getting hurt, and when I did his hand twisted backwards at a funny angle and he screamed. Whoever was with me at the time dragged me away to a house, and it wasn't until later I realized it was me that caused the man's injury.

 

"After that I was kidnapped, apparently the wrong people had seen me use my power. I was taken to some kind of facility were they would test me to see what exactly would trigger me to use my powers. I didn't know how to bring them out at the time for the first few years. It wasn't until later when a new doctor was introduced to me, that I learned how to harness them more. His name was Doctor…" You froze. You couldn't remember his name. Hell, you couldn't remember his face.

 

You looked up at Dr. Banner before continuing, "I-I don't remember. He was a guy, he was the only one who was kind to me, then something… something happened, he, he just disappeared."

 

Seeing the distress on your face, Bruce stopped you, asking you to continue with what you could remember.

 

You nodded slowly, trying to remember the doctor's face. After a moment you shook your head, you could figure that out later, just get these tests over with.

 

"Basically, the doctor helped me figure out more about my abilities, but I was never allowed to know much. All I know is I can feel people around me. I can reach out with my mind to people that are within about a kilometers radius from me, and make them move. It's not like mind control, it's almost like I can feel the muscles in their bodies and make them do what I want."

 

Dr. Banner nodded, writing something down in a folder. He walked over to a table picking up a few small items before returning to you.

 

"That's all I need to know for now, I'm just going to extract some DNA and take a blood sample, Director Fury will ask you his questions while I do this," he smiled again at you before asking Tony for something. You liked him, you decided. He was kind, and didn't seem scared of you.

 

As Fury began to speak you interrupted him. "I have two questions before I answer anything. One, why are they here?" you ask, gesturing to Natasha and Steve, "and two, what do you plan to do with me after all this?"

 

Fury seemed annoyed at your interruption, but answered anyway. "Rogers and Romanoff are here because so far they are the only one who have seen your powers in action, and to answer your second question, we don’t know yet, but as soon as we do I'll be sure to let you know," he explained before continuing.

 

"As I was saying before, Natasha said that you made her punch Rogers in the jaw, giving you time to run, but for some reason instead of running immediately, you seemed to pause staring at Natasha almost… how did you explain her look again?"

 

"Menacing, sir," Natasha answered.

 

You immediately looked down, you had hoped she hadn't noticed, but of course, this was your life, and nothing ever went right.

 

"Menacing, that was it. Now, (y/n), would you like to explain to me why this hesitation occurred?" he inquired, sounding more demanding than anything.

 

You continued to stare at your hands, playing with your figures for a minute before answering. "I'm not always in control of my powers, my powers aren't entirely… me."

 

"What do you mean not you?" questioned the man in front of you.

 

You looked around the room for support, hoping maybe someone would read your mind or something, so you wouldn't have to say it out loud. Your search was in vain though, all you got was sympathy from the other men, and a curious look from the redhead.

 

You took a deep breath, looking the man in the eye. "I can't control myself if I use my full power. I've only been allowed to use it once, and I don’t remember any details about what happened, but I know it ended badly. I have this device in my wrist that stops me from using my power to it's full extent, that's why I could never escape." You paused looking over at Natasha. "When I was looking at you I was resisting the temptation of making you kill Captain Rogers."

 

Steve looked shocked at your confession while Natasha and Fury seemed to have expected this. You looked back down as Dr. Banner walked over to you, lifting your arm to examine the small piece of metal.

 

His thoughts seemed to be running a million miles a minute as Tony came to stand next to him.

 

"Thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?" Tony asked.

 

"Probably," sighed Dr. Banner.

 

"Woohoo! I was right, as always, you guys really should learn to trust me more," Tony rambled walking over to a strange looking machine.

 

"You say this as if you didn't create a psychotic, blood-thirsty robot," Steve said, joining the conversation.

 

Tony groaned, "Shut it Spangles, it's been a year."

 

Before Steve could retort, Bruce stepped in, "We are not having this argument again, Tony, Steve, argue on your own time, and Tony slow down, we need to run this by (y/n) and Fury before anything."

 

"Run what by me?" Fury asked before you could.

 

"Tony and I have made a test that can determine if you carry the mutant gene, more reliable than a blood test, and how soon it will appear in your family, but it might also be able to determine the strength of the person's mutation if they already have one," Bruce explained, looking between you and Fury.

 

"Wait, are you saying I'm a 'mutant'? Also what is a mutant, and does this mean there are others like me?" you demanded before Fury could open his mouth.

 

"Woah there Sparky," Tony started, making you roll your eyes, "Yes you are what the government calls a 'mutant.'

Basically, you were born with a genetic mutation that has given you some sort of power. It's ultimately just evolution, trying to make humans stronger to compete with all the newfound superhumans, like Cap and Natasha here. Well I guess they aren’t the best examples, more like… Thor. And yes there are many of you, although we don’t know how many, and probably never will."

 

You nodded, trying to process this as a memory began to resurface. "I've met others with abilities," you began, making the others look at you. "There were two of them, they had different powers than me, but I remember them, one of them was used to mess with my mind, torture me." You closed your eyes, rubbing your temples trying desperately to remember who they were, talking drew you away from your thoughts though.

 

"She could mean---"

 

"Yes we are all aware, Tony, but it's a slim chance so drop it," Natasha scolded.

 

You were too consumed by your own confusion to really register what they were saying, so you continued your previous questions. "How long will the test take?"

 

Bruce looked to you before informing you, "It could potentially cause you pain, (y/n), we haven't had any test subjects."

 

You ignored his warning asking again, "And? How long will it take?"

 

"There's a thin line between brave and stupid, (y/n)," Steve warned.

 

"Just answer the question," you demanded.

 

"Well this device will circle your head for about an hour and then it will take an additional five to ten to process the data," responded Bruce warily.

 

"Well, then, let's get started," you suggested.

 

"Ah, one more thing, we would need to remove the metal in your wrist, it could mess with the test results," Tony added.

 

Your eyes widened, realizing why they had been wary. You tried to dig into your mind to figure out what had happened the last time you hadn't had the small device in you. You don't remember anything bad happening until you had attempted to use your powers and even then, you couldn't remember if you had even caused any damage.

 

"If you remove the device I will have to refrain from using my powers, but if I do use them I have no guarantee that you'll be able to stop me," you stated, trying to make them aware of the risks before you went through this.

 

"If you can refrain from using your powers, then I see no problem in this," Fury concluded, almost daring you to disagree.

 

You nodded to him looking over at Bruce and giving him a small nod to signal that you were ready.

 

He gathered a small syringe and some gauze before laying you down to begin the surgery.

 

You took in a sharp breath as the needle went into your wrist, and before you could complain your wrist and hand went numb. You saw Natasha and Steve look away as the device was removed.

 

Not half an hour later you were sitting with a bandaged wrist waiting for the test to begin. As the hour of hearing nothing but mechanical noises spinning around your head passed, you noticed Fury and Steve had left. Leaving only you sitting, Bruce scribbling notes, Tony pressing buttons, and Natasha switching between watching you and using a small device in her hand.

 

By the time the hour was up, it was dark outside and you felt yourself falling asleep.

 

"We'd better get you to your room before one of us has to carry you," the red head smirked, now gazing at you.

 

You nodded standing up slowly, waving goodbye to Tony and Bruce before following Natasha out the door.

 

Boarding the elevator, Natasha pushed a button for floor 3 before speaking. "You're going to be under surveillance for a while until we learn more about you, so don't do anything Tony can use as blackmail," she explained, leading you down the hall to a door labeled with your name.

 

She nodded for you to open the door following you in to show you a few things before leaving the room with a goodnight.

 

You walked over to the bed touching the soft cotton before laying down.

 

You lay there for a while trying to get comfortable, but the bed was too soft. Grabbing a pillow and blanket from the bed you laid down on the floor, pulling the blanket up the your head. Before you knew it you were asleep.


	4. Day One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You spend some time in the labs and get to know some of the Avengers better. (a bit of a filler chapter sorry)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this is going to be a reader x Natasha story so if you don't like, obviously don't read. The next chapter should be up soon!!

As you woke up the next morning, you felt less groggy than normal. No wanting to waste time wondering why, you stood up and walked to the bathroom, stumbling along the way.

 

You looked in the mirror, grimacing, before splashing water on your face. The water seemed to wake you up because suddenly you remembered where you were and why.

 

Your pulse quickened as you remembered the test from the night before, and you had to stop yourself from rushing outside in only a t-shirt and underwear, to see the test results.

 

You looked around and found a towel and some fresh clothes, and took one of the fastest showers in your life.

 

You grabbed some pointy tweezers from the medicine cabinet in your bathroom before exiting the room, subconsciously needing something besides your powers to protect yourself.

 

As soon as you stepped out the door F.R.I.D.A.Y's voice greeted you, "Good morning, Miss y/n, Dr. Banner, Mr. Stark, and Director Fury are awaiting your arrival in the labs. Miss Romanoff wished for me to tell you there is food awaiting you there as well."

 

You were confused by the last sentence, why would a complete stranger care if you ate? You pulled up many scenarios in your mind, you were useful, maybe she was under orders, but none of them seemed to connect to her actions.

 

You brushed off the train of thought and continued quickly to the labs, anxious to hear the test results.

 

As you entered the lab, the smell of coffee and eggs greeted you, you'd only been given coffee once, but you remembered the distinct smell and taste.

 

Walking over to the table with food you grabbed a mug and plate and sat down before being greeted by the three men. Before you could respond though, Tony spoke again,

 

"Morning, y/n, Nat seems to be stalking you more than normal, and that's saying something."

 

You looked up confused but glaring, "What does that mean, Stark?"

 

Bruce spoke up before Tony could even open his mouth, "Tony, it is only 6 am leave the poor girl alone, and leave Natasha out of this, no one here besides maybe Clint, knows what kind of behavior is 'normal' for her."

 

Tony put his hands up in a defensive position, "Sorry, just trying to make a joke, forgot normal people don't wake up at 3 am, although you hardly classify as normal."

 

You looked back down at your meal, realizing Tony wasn't trying to be menacing. You began shoveling down your eggs and sipping the coffee like it was a fine wine before you realized you were being watched.

 

Looking up, you saw the three men looking at you oddly. You glared, "Can I help you?" you questioned sarcastically. Sarcasm was a pretty good defense mechanism when you were cornered, you had come to learn.

 

Tony and Fury immediately looked away but Bruce kept his eyes on your own, with something like pity in his eyes.

 

"How often did you eat while you were… not here, y/n?" he asked gently.

 

You held back a biting remark, realizing that it would get you no where. You answered quietly, "I didn't have a specific time to eat, they just gave me food when it was convenient  for them I guess. And sometimes um… they forgot," you finished, looking down. You didn't want to see any pity right now, it isn't what you needed.

 

You continued to eat, finishing up a second helping before standing up and approaching the table filled with vials and computer screens.

 

"Have you finished the test yet?" you asked, nervousness lacing your tone.

 

"In… just… one… moment, okay… and… now we have!" Tony exclaimed looking to Bruce as he hit one last button on his floating screen.

 

Bruce finished whatever he was typing out before swiping it over to the main screen Tony was working with.

 

Fury stood up to walk over to the screen as you followed his suit.

 

You read over the screen, but you honestly got nothing from it, the others didn't seem to have your same problem. As the minutes passed you became impatient, finally demanding what was going on.

 

"We should probably tell you this while we're all sitting… and after all your food has settled," Tony stated.

 

"I second that notion, why don’t we do this upstairs?" concluded Dr. Banner.

 

Seeing your impatience, Fury made a quick decision, "F.R.I.D.A.Y., tell Cap and Agent Romanoff to meet us in conference room D in fifteen minutes."

 

"Yes, sir," complied the AI.

 

You audibly groaned at the knowledge you'd have to wait even longer, but quickly quieted when you realized you had been insubordinate, _out loud_. You froze and looked down waiting for punishment, but gazed up when you heard laughter.

 

"So you do have emotions besides sarcasm," Tony laughed, "nice to know."

 

You stayed frozen as the three men began gathering supplies and exiting the room.

 

"You coming, y/n?" Tony questioned, his gaze sympathetic.

 

You shook your head, smiling vaguely and leaving the room.

 

This place was different, you decided, in a good way.


	5. Results

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Your test results are in, and not as pleasant as you had hoped for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long, my life's been a little insane lately, but hopefully I'll have more time to write these next few weeks! Also sorry for the angst in this chapter, the next one is significantly happier!!

Patience was one of your few virtues, but in this moment it had somehow disappeared.

 

While you seemed calm on the outside, your brain was moving a million miles a minute. It had definitely been more than fifteen minutes. Where you dying? Maybe that's why they had called a formal meeting, and Bruce kept looking at you like a wounded puppy. Or maybe… they were going to kill--no you can't think like that. _One step at a time, y/n, no jumping to conclusions_ , you thought to yourself.

 

You could feel the others stares on your back, none of them looking for too long, but enough for you to notice. Only one stayed the longest, the Black Widow.

 

As her gaze continued to be focused on you, you decided to stare back.

 

You looked at her. You stared right back into her eyes expecting to see hatred, anger, even fear… but none of those emotions were present. There was nothing sinister in her eyes, just… curiosity.

 

You only looked away when the director cleared his throat.

 

You looked up quickly, but Natasha's gaze left your face slower. This almost caused to look back over, but the dimming lights and glowing screen stopped you.

 

Just behind Fury, the screen began showing all types of data in separate boxes, one of the boxes seemed to be moving in random patterns. Another was obviously a scan of your brain.

 

The Director was apparently one for dramatic pauses because it was a solid minute before Natasha spoke up.

  
"Sir, what the hell is going on with her brain activity," Natasha asked, causing you to tense. She seemed more concerned than curious though, which confused you.

 

"I was just about to get to that," replied Fury.

 

"Were you?" she scoffed, earning her a glare from Fury.

 

"Yes, I was Romanoff, and if you will _allow_ me I will continue."

 

Natasha seemed annoyed but backed down with grace.

 

"As I was about to say," began Fury, "Miss y/n's brain activity is… abnormal, but as far as Banner and Stark can tell, not unhealthy. Since I'm no biologist, I'll leave the explaining to Dr. Banner, and remember, blunt is better than gentle in these cases doctor."

 

Dr. Banner nodded as he approached the screen, with what appeared to be  smaller screen in his hands, you'd have to remember to ask him about it later.

 

"What we're looking at here is a three dimensional scan of y/n's brain, a sample of her blood containing DNA, and a graph of her nervous system's activity.

 

"Looking at the 3D scan first, you can see some portions are larger than the average human, and some smaller. The larger ones appear to have been there all her life, while the smaller than normal sections appear to have been experimented on and possibly shrunk on purpose. The smaller sections include long-term memory and the pain section of the emotional area. This could explain the difficulty you have remembering more than a few weeks ago, and why when we removed the device from your arm, you showed no signs of discomfort.

 

"Now, as for the enlarged areas, two appear to have been enlarged experimentally, while two are there naturally. The skilled movements area, and the amygdala--the emotional learning piece of the brain-- are both enlarged. Skilled movements section remembers any combat skills or defensive training you may have y/n, and allows you to learn them faster. Now as for the amygdala. It is _supposed_ to be a small group of nuclei, but yours has nuclei added, and that is dangerous. The amygdala helps you learn, but through fear. It's the place all anxiety and even depression originate. Enlarging this…this is a form of torture to be honest. There has obviously been thorough fear conditioning used on you, y/n."

 

You knew what he was talking about. All those times they would say a name or a place or make you do something then shock you, or beat you. All the times you were forces into dark rooms with who-knows-what lurking, just because you'd spoken out of turn, or if you would refuse, god if you ever refused… _Stop. This is not the place,_ you thought as you dragged yourself from your past.

 

As you shook your head Bruce continued,

 

"Now as for the naturally occurring enlarged sections… The cerebellum, the area of the brain focused on voluntary balance and coordination, and the intellectual sections, these are enlarged because of your…mutation."

 

Your head shot up at that. _Mutation? I'm a 'mutant'?_

 

Before you could speak Captain Rogers intervened, "So your saying she's a mutant? Like Wand--"

 

"Yes, Rogers, like the _other mutants_ that we've met before," hissed Natasha, clearly wanting to shut him up about something.

 

"Okay… so what does this mean?" you questioned, finally speaking up.

 

Dr. Banner cleared his throat before starting again, "If we look at the blood sample, it will help me explain. These highlighted parts are where your DNA is… different than a normal human's. This is what allows you to control others-"

 

"Yes, but how do I control others? What is it that actually allows me to?" you interrupted, growing impatient.

 

"To put it simply, you can control other peoples nervous systems," sighed Tony.

 

You looked between him and Bruce, to make sure he wasn't lying, but all you saw was Bruce sigh and roll his eyes.

 

"Thanks Tony," Bruce started, "looking over towards the graph of your nervous system's activity, you can see it's out of control. This would normally be dangerous _but_ , because of your mutation and enlarged cerebellum, everything balances out."

 

"So, what your saying is that y/n can reach out to the part of someone that runs throughout their _entire body_ and therefore make them move at her will? That's insane!" Steve stated, almost seeming scared.

 

You immediately went into defense mode, gripping the makeshift weapon in your pocket before Natasha spoke up, "It's no crazier than telekinesis, Rogers, or enhanced healing," she said glaring at him, "So what does this mean for y/n, will she be able to control it? Or will it take another type of inhibitor that we pulled from her wrist?"

 

"I was about to get to that," Bruce explained, "If we look back at y/n's brain scan, you'll see there is almost no activity coming from the emotional areas, mainly in the frontal lobe, which is abnormal, this one in a not-so-good way."

 

"Just say it," you demanded, preparing for the worst.

 

Dr. Banner looked at you before continuing, "What you said last night, that you were holding back from making Natasha… seriously injure Steve, I believe this more dormant area is what awakens when you use your powers, making your emotions run wild and making you become someone you are not."

 

"Making me want to kill people, you mean?" you snapped.

 

"Yes and no. I believe you do not want to hurt people, but when you use your powers without care, and get lost in them, you… forget what kind of a person you are, possibly even who you are."

 

You sat there silently trying to process everything Dr. Banner had revealed. _So it isn’t me that wants to lose all control?_ you wondered. You tried to think back to the last time you used your powers without limitation, but you couldn't remember. All that you remember was being given orders, and following through with them. You remembered blackouts, then waking up to your target being dead already. You had convinced yourself that it wasn't you who killed, because you couldn't remember, but this changed everything.

 

You could feel yourself falling apart, who were you? What had you done that you couldn't remember? You abruptly stood, giving a poor excuse as you hastily made your way back to your assigned room. You felt everyone's eyes on you as you left, you even heard someone stand up, but you didn’t stay long enough to find out who.

 

By the time you arrived in your room tears were falling. As you shut the door behind you, you sank to the ground, letting your tears flow freely for the first time in probably years.

 

Who are you?

 

What have you done?

 

How many people have you hurt?

 

And how many more will you?

 

Those were the last thoughts you had before falling into a restless sleep.


	6. The Grand Tour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A tour of the tower, and an unexpected encounter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait! But I am going on vacation this week so I should have more time to write over the next two weeks! Thank you again for reading and I hope you like it!

When you woke up your eyes felt heavier than normal, and extremely puffy.

 

 _When did I fall asleep last night? And how early is it now? And more importantly, how did I get in bed?_ you thought.

 

Slowly opening your eyes, you looked towards the clock on the nightstand. _4:30 am, ugh_ , you groaned rolling over. You lay there for a while before sitting up and rubbing your eyes.

 

You looked down at yourself. You still had the same clothes on as last night, but your shoes had been removed and set against the wall.

 

You were grateful for whoever had moved you into your bed, but shocked and almost… afraid that they had.

 

After what you had discovered yesterday, how could anyone still treat you human, let alone kindly?

 

Pushing these thoughts from your head, you stood and walked to the small dresser against the wall seeing new, and different, clothing sitting on top. Reaching down to touch the fabric you realized it was much softer and nicer than the clothing you had originally been provided with.

 

Not wanting to think about it too much, you picked up the clothing and headed to the bathroom to shower and change.

 

\-------------

 

By the time you had finished getting ready it was 7 am. Seeing as it was a more decent hour of the day, you walked out of your room and to the elevator at the end of the hall. Asking Friday to take you somewhere with food, you felt the elevator ascend.

 

When the doors slid open you were greeted by the sound of laughing and dishes clanking together. You braced yourself for the inevitable awkwardness that would follow your entrance and walked forward.

 

When the four Avengers currently in the room turned to you though, none of them seemed afraid or even slightly uneasy. Sam smiled at you, then continued his conversation with Steve, who had simply nodded in your direction. Natasha looked you up and down, smiling as her eyes lingered on you for longer than the other's had. Clint was the only one who talked to you though.

 

"Hey, y/n, there's food on the counter over there, Sam decided to make actual breakfast this morning instead of leaving us to fend for ourselves," the archer chuckled, looking in Sam's direction.

 

Sam stopped whatever he was saying to Steve to intervene, "I don’t know why you think it's my job to feed you Barton, you’re a grown man. Go out and shoot something with that bow of yours if you're always _so_ hungry."

 

Clint threw what looked to be a plastic fork in Sam's direction before turning back to you.

 

"Anyway, help yourself, there are plates and actual silverware in the cabinets if you need them."

 

You murmured a quick thank you, walking around a wall that lead to the kitchen, blocking you from their view.

 

You found the plates fairly quickly but by the time you noticed someone was watching you, you still hadn't found the forks or knives.

 

"Need some help?" Natasha asked, walking slowly towards you.

 

Just by her stance, you could tell she was trying not to scare you, but stay on guard herself, you appreciated that, nodding to answer her.

 

She walked around you, pulling out a drawer and handing you a fork and knife, sharp sides pointing at herself.

 

"Thank you," you said looking in her eyes, wanting her to know you were grateful for more than just the silverware.

 

She smiled, and you found your mouth twitch up as well.

 

She turned towards the food, waving you over.

 

"So, how many do you want?" she questioned, gesturing to the pancakes in front of her.

 

You shrugged, like you'd seen Clint do earlier, and she scooped two onto your plate.

 

"You can always have more if you want, and here--" she picked up some strawberries, placing them on and around your pancakes, "--this is my favorite way to eat them, just put some syrup on them, and it'll be perfect."

 

You nodded, letting her take the lead back to the dining room.

 

"You know Bucky hates that Sam," Steve said as you two walked in, "just stop the 'Frozen' jokes and maybe you'll have less bruises."

 

Steve turned to Natasha, rolling his eyes at his friend before looking at you.

 

"Hey, aren't those your clothes, Na--" Steve began, only to yell out an annoyed "ouch."

 

You turned to Natasha looking confused, but all she did was gesture towards a chair next to hers.

 

You sat down, content to just listen and watch as these incredibly powerful and dangerous people acted almost… normal.

 

\-------------

 

When you finished eating, Steve took your plate along with his and Clint's, intent on keeping everything clean.

 

"So, y/n," Clint began, "Me and Nat were thinking about giving you the grand tour today, since you'll be staying here for a while, not that you have to stay, I mean, it's just, we don’t want you getting lost or feeling overwhelmed or--"

 

"Smooth, Hawkeye," Natasha mocked, "We just want you to feel as comfortable here as possible here y/n, we all felt out of place here at one time or another, and we just want to make that feeling disappear as soon as possible."

 

You smiled at her, that was the most she had ever said to you. You decided you liked her voice.

 

Clint clapped is hands together and stood, taking your smile as a yes, "Perfect! I figured we could go from the bottom to the top, it's a good way to do things, trust me."

 

You simply nodded, not knowing what he was trying to say as you and Natasha stood.

 

\-------------

 

As you, Clint, and Natasha walked through the private quarters, already halfway through the tour, you couldn't stop thinking how nice this place, and these people were. You had never experienced anything like it and it was almost… unsettling at times. You were pretty sure you could get used to it, though.

 

A ringing sound dragged you from your thoughts as you jumped a bit.

 

Natasha seemed to reach out her hand, as if to comfort you, but stopped a few inches short of actually touching you.

 

Clint reached down to grab what you were pretty sure was a cell phone from his pocket and lifted it to his ear.

 

"Agent Barton…Yes…No…Hmm…Understood…Thank you, sir."

 

"You have to go I'm assuming," Natasha mused.

 

"You truly are a genius, Nat. Sorry, y/n, I guess we'll just have to continue the tour later…unless of course Natasha would like to finish it for me."

 

"Fury doesn’t like to be kept waiting Barton, and I'm sure y/n and I can handle ourselves without you," Natasha said, smiling at you.

 

You nodded, smiling back as Clint headed for the elevators.

 

"I guess we'll continue," Natasha smiled, starting to walk again.

 

"I'm okay with that," you said quietly.

 

\-------------

 

You had made it all the way up to the so-called "Party Deck" before you said anything again.

 

When you and Natasha walked around the corner to view the skyline, you weren't expecting anyone else to be there, let alone him.

 

The second you laid eyes on his metal arm you jumped in front of Natasha.

 

"If you want to harm anyone in this tower, you will have to go through me first, _Soldier_ ," you hissed, putting all the venom you could into the nickname.

 

He spun around amazingly fast, but you were quicker, leaping forward to kick the back of his knee, knocking him down in time for you to wind an arm around his neck. Before you could make another move though, he wheezed out a single, terrifying word.

 

_"Inferno."_

 

Within a second, you were out cold.


	7. Nocturnus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Waking up in a cage with the Winter Soldier right outside is probably your least favorite way to wake up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long!! I kept hating everything I was writing, but here it is chapter 7. Also I'm using comic book Natasha, hence the "100 years ago" since in the comics she's around Steve's age, if not older. Enjoy!!

"…Why didn't you tell me! I should have been the _first_ to know about a Hydra 'refugee,' not second to last."

 

"It wasn't something we thought you needed to know yet. And I don't understand, how does this information change anything? We already knew she was dangerous, this shouldn't-"

 

"Natalia, she was almost always able to take even _me_ down, the goddamned Winter Soldier, with little to no effort or concentration. We _should_ be scared of her! Plus that shut down word only works once, it's a miracle she gave me enough time to say it."

 

You woke up to hushed arguing, feeling more alert than ever, but confused.

 

What had happened? When had you passed out? Who had you been with… _the Soldier._

 

The second it hit you, you jumped to your feet, ready for a fight, only to discover you were in some sort of glass cell.

 

On the other side of the cell walls stood Natasha and the one and only Winter Soldier.

 

You knew it. You had known it all along. This whole place had been too good to be true. From Natasha Romanoff to the food and warm clothes, you _knew it._

 

This whole thing was no more than another test from Hydra. To try and see if people cared, would you grow weak? Or stronger? They must have gotten their answer because here you were, back in a cage, and one even less comfortable than the last.

 

You wanted to scream, to bang your fists against the walls around you until blood dripped from them.

 

But something stopped you.

 

Her eyes.

 

When you had jumped up Natasha's eyes had gone from their normal stand-offish, ready for anything look, to… something else.

 

You couldn’t quite place it. It was some strange and beautiful cross between fear, relief, and concern.

 

Beautiful… that was a good word to describe her. You had read it in many books in many different languages, but had never seen anything that could fit into that description. But somehow she did.

 

You mentally shook yourself. _You're in a cage y/n, and for some reason the Winter Soldier is on the other side of it, stop thinking about… whatever this is._

 

You hardened your features, ready for any betrayal that was bound to come.

 

Staring straight past her eyes and all the emotion in them, you hissed at the Soldier in front of you.

 

"What kind of test is this, _Izmennik._ I thought you had been _decommissioned_."

 

You hadn't been forced to learn Russian as the rest of Hydra had, something about them wanting to keep you in the dark, but you had picked up on your fair share of words that were tossed around. Especially around him. You knew this one would bring back the worst memories, and you were trying to scare him. _Traitor_ , is what it meant. It had been thrown at him without him knowing why he was called such. Seeing as he had forgotten all about being an American soldier, it was like a cruel inside joke amongst everyone but him.

 

You had thought it too cruel, until you both had been forced into the same room who knows how long ago.

 

His jawed clenched before speaking, "That's not who I am anymore, I remember _everything_. From before and during my stay at Hydra. That's more than you can say I'll bet."

 

You held your ground. You knew emotions were weaknesses when shown, and you weren't about to let him have any satisfaction.

 

"I may not remember everything, but at least I don’t have to live with what you did."

 

"That's real rich coming from you, _Nocturnus_."

 

Any air you had in your lungs disappeared the second that name fell from his lips. You stumbled back a step into the opposite wall of your cell.

 

Natasha --who had been frozen in place, assessing your conversation until this point-- was suddenly on guard, pushing the Soldier from the room, and calling for someone else.

 

You however, were paralyzed.

 

_Nocturnus._ With just a word, everything stopped. You felt yourself thrown back in time. Everything around you was a blur, except for the emotions. Blurs of fire and darkness and needles and cages were punctuated with fear, panic, emptiness, power and _pain._ Oh god, the pain. You felt as if the world around you had turned into fire and was burning you from the outside, while raw emotions grated you from the inside.

 

Screams echoed in your head, and it was almost too late when you realized one of the screams was your own.

 

Opening your eyes, you saw a few of the Avengers outside of the room surrounding your cell and Natasha on the floor, her eyes clenched shut, trying to crawl towards you while the others tried desperately to open the door.

 

Your vision was sharp but everything had taken on a dull red hue, and you could feel every body in the room.

 

You looked down at your hands and willed yourself to calm down. You could feel yourself blinding Natasha and sending pain her way, and you needed it to stop.

 

 With a cry of effort and exhaustion you clenched your fists, stopping your flow of power, and you fell to the ground, along with the walls of your cell.

 

The moments after you shut down were chaos, but you almost couldn't tell.

 

Natasha had run towards you, hopping over broken glass to get near you, while Steve practically ripped the door open letting the other Avengers spill into the room.

 

Through clouded eyes you saw Clint run to Natasha holding her back from you, Steve shieling Agent 13 from you, and Bucky backing away out of the room, anywhere away from your collateral damage.

 

Walking slowly through the mess was Director Fury. You knew what was coming. You knew what always came next. And there was nothing you could do to prevent it.

 

You pulled your left sleeve up to your elbow and took a deep breath before sending shocks to your nerve endings all down your arm. You bit your tongue until you felt blood, knowing if you screamed you would receive a worse punishment.

 

Director Fury had frozen in front of you as he watched the tiny sparks light up underneath your skin as you caused yourself almost unbearable pain.

 

"Jesus Christ," came Steve's voice.

 

The second he spoke, having realized what you were doing, Natasha sprung into action.

 

Pushing Clint aside, she launched herself at you, pulling your arm down and forcing you to look into her eyes.

 

You almost pushed her away, scared they would hurt her too, but you realized no one was stopping her.

 

With one hand holding your pained arm down and the other raising your head up to look at her, she began forcefully speaking.

 

"You don’t have to hurt yourself here. We are not Hydra. The Winter Soldier is a refugee here, just like you. We are not Hydra, y/n. You're safe here. You don’t have to do that anymore."

 

With each word you felt the pain in your arm subside and you felt yourself relax into her, your arm falling down to your side.

 

She continued to assure you as she let your head fall to her chest.

 

As she kneeled in front of you, you reached your uninjured arm up slightly to grip something, anything to ground you, finding her shirt. You held on as though your life depended on it.

 

When her words stopped, you realized no one had moved. Steve still stood with an arm in front of Sharon, Clint still knelt slightly as though he were still holding Natasha, and Fury still looked shocked and almost scared.

 

You didn't dare move. Feeling safer than you had in a long time, scared if you so much as took a deeper breath than normal, this illusion would shatter.

 

After a long time the Director spoke.

 

"What happened, Romanoff. You called for backup and not even a minute later, we got here and Agent Barnes was locked out of the room with you crawling blindly towards y/n."

 

Still holding on to you she responded, "Barnes lost his self control, and said…" she paused not wanting to speak the name again, "the Latin word for 'belonging to the night' which appeared to trigger y/n, leading to her powers coming out in self defense."

 

You slowly lifted your head in confusion. Had she just… defended you? Why? Why would she care enough to? Hydra had drilled it into your mind that no one would ever care for you, that you were alone in this world. Those things had always been true, _and always will be_ , you reminded yourself. But then why would she say that?

 

Releasing your grip on Natasha's shirt, you leaned back slightly, looking into her eyes, searching for some kind of truth. Some reason as to why she would defend you of all people. She turned her head to look back at you as the Captain began speaking.

 

"What do you mean he lost his self control? He hasn't had a relapse in months, why would she cause one?"

 

Natasha continued to into your eyes as she replied, "I don't know everything, Rogers. Why don't you go ask him yourself and stop speaking like y/n isn't here."

 

Steve nodded his head before walking out of the room, Sharon following soon after.

 

After a moment Fury spoke, "I'll leave you to help y/n get back to a better mental state, but you know the protocol for this Natasha, don't let _anything_ get in the way of that, understood?"

 

Natasha simply nodded as Fury left the room and Clint stood.

 

Her eyes flickered from yours for only a moment to assure Clint she was fine alone.

 

As soon as the door slid shut behind him, you spoke.

 

"Why did you defend me? What do you want from me?" The words came out harsher than you intended but you were terrified. You didn't understand why she was doing this, and you needed answers.

 

She didn't seem offended though, in fact she almost seemed to understand.

 

She took a deep breath, as though she were bracing herself before she spoke,

 

"About 100 years ago I was trained in a place called the Red Room, under my given name, Natalia Alianova Romanovna. I was part of a KGB operation called the Black Widow Program, where I was trained to be a deadly assassin, no fear, no care, no emotions. Only kills. I don't remember my family, but I remember everything else, all of the things they did to me. All the things they made me do, all the things they did to others to hurt me," her eyes grew more distant the more she spoke, "After years I finally managed to escape the Red Room, but I had no practical skills, so I was forced to kill for a living. My track record caught SHEILDs attention, and Clint Barton was sent to terminate me. He made a different call."

 

Pausing for a moment, she pulled herself from the past, looking into your eyes once again, "I know how it feels to be where you are now. I know you're scared, I know you don't believe that anyone could ever care, or that you deserve be cared for. But you do, y/n. You always have and always will. And if you ever need anything, I'm here."

 

As she finished talking you simply sat there,  looking for any deception in her eyes, anything that would match with what you had been taught your whole life.

 

But all you saw was honesty.

 

All you saw was care and sincerity, and it was almost scary to see such raw emotion directed at you.

 

She slowly stood, reaching her hand down to help you up. With a little hesitation, you accepted her hand and were pulled to your feet.

 

You stood there for a moment trying to think of anyway to thank her for what she had done, simply saying it didn't seem enough to you.

 

As she began to walk you to the door, you stopped her. Stepping closer to her and reaching your arms around her waist you pulled her towards you into an embrace.

 

You could barely remember what an embrace was but it was in your mind somewhere, buried underneath pain and suffering, it was there. And _she_ brought it out of hiding.

 

She paused only for a moment, making a small noise of surprise before she wrapped her arms around you in return, one of her hand on your back and the other in your hair, holding your head close.

 

You thought this would have felt strange, after so many years of so little physical contact, but all it felt was _right._

 

You both stayed like that for what could have been hours before you finally pulled away.

 

She took a step back but intertwined her hand with yours, wanting to keep the contact.

 

"Thanks for the hug," she smiled, looking at you.

 

_Hug,_ you thought. "I knew there was another word for that," you mumbled, making her giggle.

 

"C'mon, follow me," she said, still smiling as she lead you out the door.


	8. The Not-So-Great Escape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You finally start to feel at home only for things to go wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys I'm so sorry for not updating sooner but i started school and was having some health issues on top of that, but I'm back now and I hope you enjoy this chapter! lots of love and thank you for all the comments and kudos <3

It had been seven days since your breakdown, and you had been confined to your room the whole time. When you had asked Natasha why all she had said was "goddamned protocols." You didn't argue against the detainment, though. It was a million times better than any punishment Hydra had dealt. _No, not punishment,_ you thought. _This is just a safety measure for you and the team_.

 

Natasha had visited you daily, multiple times a day if she wasn't too busy. You didn't do much while she was there, but it was nice to have someone nearby. You had never been completely alone, always at least a camera watching you, and jumping immediately into being completely alone sort of terrified you.

 

Whenever she visited, Natasha would bring you a new book. You had mentioned liking to read to her and the next thing you knew, an empty bookshelf was being moved into your room. Natasha had said she was going to help you fill it up, book by book, and so far she was keeping that promise. The top shelf already had eight books on it.

 

As you sat on your bed, lost in the pages of The Great Gatsby, you heard a soft knock on your door before it was gently pushed open.

 

"It is 7:30 pm, which means that your room arrest is officially over," Natasha said, smiling at you.

 

Your mouth twitched up into a nervous smile as she sat down on the edge of your bed. You both just gazed at each other in a comfortable silence for what could have been hours before FRIDAY's voice interrupted,

 

"Dr. Banner wishes to see you in his lab Miss y/n as soon as possible, and he says Miss Romanoff is welcome to come as well."

 

You both stood and began to walk towards the elevators when Natasha was called to the Director's office, something about new details on an organization.

 

She looked at you silently asking if you were okay to go to the labs alone, you nodded and smiled as she let her fingers brush your arm as she walked the other way.

 

You continued your walk to the elevator, getting in and feeling it begin to move down.

 

Stepping out of the elevator, you walked down the hallway towards the lab, overhearing a conversation going on in one of the medical rooms,

 

"…was that?" you heard Captain Rogers voice echo down the hall, "You haven't had any relapses that bad in _months_. I know you don't wanna talk about it, Bucky, but it's been a week and y/n's gonna be out of her room and in public spaces now. We need to figure out how you two can be around each other and not trigger yourselves."

 

You froze at the sound of your name, unable to do anything but listen.

 

"I don't know Steve, it's just like… she called me a traitor, and all of the sudden I was there again," the Soldier began, "I was alone, and scared, and trapped and I had to fight for everything. She always got on my nerves but that was never the issue. It was that we were forced to compete for everything. We knew each others strengths and weaknesses intimately. Having her back near me is terrifying. I'm the only one who knows the full extent of her powers here, you guys don't understand and I hope you never will. There's a reason her shut down word was told even to me, Steve. She's lethal."

 

You stood there for a moment, trying to process everything he had said.

 

 _His name is Bucky?_ you thought, trying to think of a time when he had a name.

 

You closed your eyes trying to remember anything about him, but all that came up was blurred visions of the Soldier attacking you, or shooting someone in front of you. Your mind kept going back to one phrase, though.

 

_"She's lethal."_

 

Before you could process it, you were running down the hall and into the stairwell. You ran all the way down to the main level before you paused for a breath.

 

Opening up the door to the reception area you wiped your forehead on your sleeve.

 

Looking down and away from the desk with a security guard you made your way quickly towards the door before you heard a voice,

 

"Hey! Excuse me miss, I'm gonna have to ask to see your ID before you leave, I don’t remember letting you in," the guard said.

 

You knew what you had to do.

 

With your mind you reached out into the space around you, feeling for all the bodies in the area. You felt the guard but you also felt a few people running down the stairs to you. Moving quickly you reached your hand towards the security guard and flung him into the wall behind him, knocking him out.

 

You turned just in time to see Rogers, Stark, and the Soldier open the door from the stairs, looking around for you.

 

Spinning on your heel you made a break for the door. Just as you opened it you heard Stark yell for FIRDAY to lock it, but it was too late, you were out.

 

Looking around you, you tried to find some direction that felt right,  but with all the lights around you and sirens blaring, you became overwhelmed.

 

So you did the only thing you could.

 

You ran.

 

\-------------

 

You ran for at least half an hour before you began to slow, and only then because the sirens and cars were quieter here.

 

You finally came to a stopping point in front of a large tree, leaning your hands on it and taking deep breaths. After a few, you turned around to take in your surroundings.

 

You were surrounded by trees and grass, occasionally broken up by walking paths and benches. About a few hundred yards in front of you was a large piece of metal. You couldn't quite figure out what shape it was, so you made your way towards it.

 

Getting closer you realized the metal was shaped to look like people, the Avengers to be precise.

 

Stepping up to it you noticed there was writing on it,

 

"Risking their lives, so we can live ours."

 

You looked at the statue again and noticed that a crudely carved Natasha was standing closest to you. Reaching forward, you brushed your hand against her metal one.

 

"She's my favorite too," said a voice suddenly from behind you.

 

You jumped backwards prepared for the worst, it was dark and you were completely lost, anyone could be behind you. But when you turned slowly, all you saw was a dark-haired woman holding a bottle of some sort.

 

"Sorry I didn't mean to scare you, but why are you out this late? This is Central Park in New York City at night, not the safest place for a pretty girl."

 

You simply stared at her instead of responding, not knowing what the proper thing would be to say, so she continued.

 

"Black Widow is my favorite Avenger though, us girls have to stick together, this world is seriously fucked up," she laughed bitterly.

 

This time you replied quietly, "Trust me, I know."

 

"She speaks! Well do you need me to walk you home or anything? I may be drunk and not look like much, but two is still better odds than one."

 

You shook your head at her, you were lost, sure, but you didn't want to go back yet. They were bound to find you soon anyway.

 

Before she could speak again her phone began to ring,

 

" _Shit_ , it's Luke," she groaned, taking a swig of her drink, "Well it was nice talking to you, but I've got places to be and lives to ruin even more."

 

Her sarcasm almost made you laugh, but you settled for a smile.

 

"What's your name, by the way? You look familiar."

 

"Y/n," you said.

 

She smiled, "Mine's Jessica, Jessica Jones. Have a decent night, y/n, and if you ever need a PI, look me up."

 

You didn't bother to watch her leave, instead turning back to the statue.

 

Looking around you, you sat down and leaned back against the statue of Natasha's legs, deciding to wait until she found you. You felt strangely safe with her stature standing guard.


	9. Some Sense of Peace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You actually open up to someone, exciting!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I LIVE!!!

By the time Natasha and the others found you, you were half asleep leaning against their statues.

 

Natasha rushed to you crouching down, "Y/n, thank god you're okay."

 

You looked at her, confused and trying to comprehend her emotions.

 

_Why does she always seem to care more than the others? I don't deserve it and I've done nothing to merit any compassion, so why?_

 

Steve's voice drew you from your thoughts, "She needs to be taken back to the tower immediately, we can't risk her exposure, she doesn't even legally exist as far as we know."

 

"You guys start heading back to the tower, I'll handle this," Natasha said, "and if I'm not there within 10 minutes of your arrival, feel free to come after me."

 

Steve simply nodded, and gestured to the Soldier, who seemed more reluctant to leave you two alone and in a public space.

 

After the two men were at least a block away Natasha stood from her crouched position in front of you, and helped you to your feet.

 

"So do you want to tell me why you ran, but didn't want to actually escape?"

 

Though her tone was casual it was obvious she was on high alert, ready for a fight at any moment. Whether she was expecting you to fight her, or a random criminal, you hadn’t the faintest idea.

 

"I… overheard a conversation between Rogers and the Soldier, and I guess he can upset me even when he doesn't know I'm present."

 

"I'm going to make the assumption that you two's history isn't pleasant whatsoever then, huh," she said gently.

 

You simply shook your head.

 

"Let's head back to the tower and get you warm and out of the open. New York City at night, even if you are with me."

 

You smiled and let her lead the way.

 

________

 

When you arrived back at the tower with Natasha, Steve and the Soldier were waiting in the main lobby waiting. Seemingly content that the two of you were in one piece, they went their separate ways leaving you two alone once again.

 

"Come with me we can go to my floor," said Natasha.

 

You followed her up the elevator and to her floor, separate from the others.

 

After she went through an intense security system you were standing in a kitchenette attached to the rest of her living space.

 

"Every residential floor has its own kitchenette," she explained, "that's why we rarely see Barnes at communal meals."

 

She smiled as she busied herself getting two mugs and a tea kettle out.

 

"Barnes?" you questioned.

 

"Oh yeah, James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes, or as you better know him, 'The Winter Soldier.'"

 

"I never knew he even had a name, he was always just referred to as The Soldier."

 

Seemingly finished with whatever she was doing, she made her way over to you.

 

"Come over to the living room, we can sit until the tea's ready."

 

Looking around you didn't see any tell tale signs that she lived here. Sure the place was nicely furnished, _extremely_ well furnished you noticed sitting on the leather couch, but nothing…personal. Not even books.

 

_Maybe she has a separate room for books, this place is certainly big enough for it._

 

She sat down next to you, close enough to provide comfort but not close enough to make you uncomfortable.

 

Natasha was impeccable at telling your comfort zones.

 

"Do you want to talk about what exactly happened? You don't have to, you never have to talk if you don't want to, but I'm here if you do."

 

You barely had to think before you had decided you wanted to talk. To her at least.

 

"Yes, I think so," you said.

 

You felt lost for a moment. What did you want to tell her exactly? You knew all too well that emotions and sharing them was dangerous but for some reason, even after all the stories you had heard about The Black Widow, you still wanted to tell her everything.

 

You decided to go with the feeling.

 

"While I was going to see Dr. Banner, I walked by a room where Captain Rogers and the Soldier were talking. They happened to be talking about my… loss of control and the Soldier said something."

 

You swallowed, suddenly nervous.

 

"He said that I was… lethal. I'm well aware that I can be, I mean, I don't remember specific incidents, but I know I'm dangerous I just… don't want to be. I know it's childish to think this way but for some reason it was painful to hear what I already knew out loud."

 

You paused a moment to look up from your hands and into Natasha's eyes. You had expected judgement or at least some annoyance or disgust at your confession, but all you could see was understanding.

 

Confusion once again overwhelmed your senses, "I don't know why I'm even telling you this. I don't know you that well, all I've heard are stories of your past but I feel… comfortable talking with you, I don't understand… I shouldn't… it doesn't make sense. You could easily use all of this against me, emotions are supposed to be private, I-"

 

She cut you off by placing her hand over your trembling one, and you almost jumped away.

 

"I'm sorry I didn’t mean to scare you, I know being touched is not always comfortable, but I just need you to calm down and try to understand. I know how you feel and you don't need to be scared of how you feel. Especially not around me," she said, more gentle than you thought people could be.

 

Thinking back to what she had said after your incident, you realized why Natasha was so understanding. She's an _assassin. She's_ lethal in her own way.

 

_She doesn't just empathize, she_ understands.

 

You felt your eyes begin to sting and immediately grabbed onto the woman in next to you.

 

Still sitting cross-legged you wrapped your arms around her torso and buried your now wet eyes in her shoulder.

 

She froze only a millisecond before placing her arms around you as well.

 

You decided you liked being held by Natasha. You felt safer than you ever had before and didn't want the moment to end.

 

She must have felt your tears through her shirt because she began whispering comforting words in your ear. When she ran her fingers through you hair, you felt yourself sink deeper into her embrace.

 

A while later after your tears had stopped you still held on to her, realizing how exhausted you were.

 

You pulled back slightly and yawned.

 

"Do you want to sleep? I can walk you back to your room if you want?" she asked gently.

 

Your dislike of the idea must have shown on your face because she quickly backtracked.

 

"Or if you'd prefer you can sleep here. You can sleep here on the couch or use my bed, I won't be using it for a while anyway."

 

Not trusting your voice you nodded.

 

"Okay," she smiled "follow me."

 

She helped you up and keeping your hands intertwined, removed the now screaming tea kettle from the stove and made her way to a closed door.

 

Opening it, a light turned on to reveal a huge bed in the middle of a beautifully decorated room.

 

This room looked like she lived here.

 

A whole wall was filled with bookshelves, while another had pictures neatly pinned in place. You smiled looking at a picture of her and Agent Barton in what looked to be Paris covered in dirt and laughing.

 

"We were a little delirious, we were running on 5 hours of sleep over the course of three days."

 

She led you to the bed and pulled the covers back finally letting go of your hand.

 

"You can lay down here, I'll be in the kitchen cleaning up if you need anything, okay?"

 

You nodded and she turned to leave.

 

Your words stopped her though, "When your done will you come back?"

 

She turned back to you a little shocked, "Of course."

 

Content you laid down on the bed as she left.

 

You closed your eyes and tried to doze at least a bit but sleep wouldn't come.

 

When Natasha reappeared, you closed your eyes not wanting her to worry about you falling asleep. You heard her pick a book off of the shelves and opened your eyes just enough to see her sit down in the chair in a corner of the room.

 

Relaxing now she was back in the room, you fell asleep to the sound of turning pages.


End file.
